Who Are THEY?

You know what they say, "Too many cooks spoil the broth!"
Who are they?
People.
What people?
People in the know.
In the know about broth?
Oh come on, don't be silly.

It is silly to take someone so literally when they invoke the almighty, all-knowing they.  But is it being silly when you base decisions on what they say when you don't know who they are?  Sometimes I get it; if they of the fashion world say not to wear legwarmers with my tights and leotard to the gym, I listen.  If they of the nutritional world say to drink at least 8 glasses of water a day or the they in the medical field say a glass of red wine a day will reduce your chance of a heart attack, by golly, I'll listen!  Especially the latter but that goes without saying.

I'm talking about the they of unknown origin who get credit for saying pretty much anything they want without anyone challenging them.  These are the they's we magically remember when we're trying to prove a particular point or help validate a decision.  They are the they's we can't actually name therefore they are the they's who can't be challenged.  Their strength comes from one friend telling another friend telling another friend telling another until whatever they've said, becomes gospel even if no one can remember who said it when.

"They say if you drink too much Diet Coke while in your third trimester your baby will be predisposed to weight gain.  No, no, it's totally true; I read it in a magazine...or heard it on the news....oh, I can't remember where I heard it but what difference does it make?"  Welp, I'm thinkin' it makes a big difference!  Now Sue who can't live without drinking a can of Diet Coke at least once a day will get so stressed out on Diet Coke withdrawal that she'll probably cause her unborn child to develop a tick.  They say that can happen you know!

I think the older generation relies on the they quite often; at least I notice it more when speaking with an elder as opposed to a contemporary.  I wonder if it's because they are, or at least were, a more trusting generation than the cynical, "show me" Baby Boomers and Gen-X's of today.  In fact, I'm writing on the heals of a political conversation I had recently with someone from the WWII era and when I pressed for a they identification, the conversation resembled that of the lines I opened with above.  I don't think it's a terrible thing to call upon the secret army of they.  I mean, perhaps they did read it in a reputable publication or hear it from an expert on a Nova or some other fact-based program and simply can't remember well enough to satisfy the cynic asking.  But when one can't remember who they are when asked, I think it works against their point as opposed to backing it up.  The cynic just throws his hands up saying, "Oh, okay, THEY say it so it MUST be true!" thereby ending the discussion.

I do it; we all do it I think, at least from time to time.  But I do try to be conscious when throwing around the they collective.  I always assume I'll be chatting with some cynic like myself who'll stop me mid story to ask who they are and I want to make sure I have a concrete answer; "The Blahbiddityblah medical team at Johns Hopkins just released a study and I read it in Harvard Health Publications." So there!



~Eileen Cassidy Bishop